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Loneliness

Hello everybody. Today I am expressing and continuing the topic of loneliness. Loneliness is such a wide experience to discuss and many ideas and sub-topics can be branched off from it. I have been noticing and experiencing this myself lately and I am sure that many of you have as well. As I fluidly write this article my intention is not for others to sympathize or to receive condolences. For these are just superficial and ‘normal’ responses one receives from others and ultimately barely even scratches the surface of the ‘problem.’ Instead, I intend to write to better understand these thoughts and emotions that have manifested in effect due to loneliness. (and not only for my understanding but for others to understand the same feeling they are experiencing themselves) Also as we bring our attention and concentration to this experience of loneliness we are temporarily feeling, we can in effect through our free-will choose to form idea-forms that are more aligned with benevolence and onward progression.

Understanding and bringing our attention to loneliness. One of the toughest part of experiencing loneliness has to probably be the person trying to understand this feeling. Some of the key points we must understand is that loneliness and the cause of it is not a ‘one size fits all’. The severity and happenings are innumerable and one must not compare their circumstances to the other for this will only result in more confusion. It is important to realize the feeling of loneliness one feels is the same as others, but the reaction and natural impulse one puts out is determined by their level of consciousness. For instance, I have felt and experienced loneliness many times throughout my life. While some experiences may root from the same cause, there are also other happenings that we have never gone through that result in this feeling of loneliness. It is often more than not the uncontrollable rather than the controllable that makes us feel this way; more on this later. Another point to understand is that the level of consciousness one possesses at the time of the experience is very detrimental to the effect it has on them. Through our own choice we ourselves have the power to either consciously or unconsciously react to this happening. We can consciously or unconsciously choose to bring our attention and concentration to the problem or not. If we consciously choose to bring our attention and concentration to this feeling we in result work towards self-progression and realization instead of ignoring and bottling up the experience and emotion. As I said, depending on the consciousness of the person, choosing to consciously face the feeling and experience is just the beginning. In effect, idea-forms are than created by the individual (some idea-forms are actually not created from the individual, and instead reside and come from the collective idea-forms of society. This is not yet realized or one should say mainstream in modern psychology or by the modern psychologist. For the reader or psychologist to understand how this is even possible requires a ton of explanation and experience. Most importantly direct experience is required for the being, the self-limiting mind along with its finite dialogue more often than not results in denial when this topic is addressed. This will not always be, as we evolve and move forward through time both individually and collectively more people will broaden their perceptions) and more often than not when someone is choosing for the first time to consciously understand this temporal mode of existence they will create self-defeating ideas rather than forward progressive thoughts. Some may choose to blame themselves while another may choose to blame others. Both reactions are of no real help, instead one must tell themselves “It is my responsibility to focus my awareness and try to understand this experience I am temporarily going through.” (that alone requires a strong will and a sincere aspiring attitude for progression) This brings us back to what I am still further explaining on what attitude one chooses to respond with. Just like the causes that led to this experience of loneliness, there are no set or certain happenings that can determine the attitude one will react with. Our attitudes are simply indeterminable and infinite. Our attitudes are mostly drawn and a result from our past traumas, wounds, triggers, shadows, and misleading childhood thought-forms. Once again, these traumas and wounds and etc. vary from person to person and in their nature, are subjective and unlimited. (DO NOT allow yourself to take the words of someone who states, “I had it worse” or “That is not a ‘good’ reason to be lonely” seriously)

Attitude. The person going through and consciously choosing to go through loneliness for the first time will more often than not react and possess a negative attitude compared to the person who has consciously chosen many of times to bring their concentration to the feeling. If I were to imagine or try and understand one of the causes of this, I would say that the current “Positive Mindset Only, Think Happy Be Happy, Positive Vibes Only” you know the basic idea that one should think positive only and everything will eventually be okay idea? Yeaaa, that. This idea-form is very misleading and mis-informative. (one can say it is so widely spread that it has transformed into a false and deceiving characteristic some people use to label their self as) Even though this idea-form is so widely spread and agreed upon through many books, authors, teachers, and solutions that does not necessarily make it ‘right’ or ‘true’. Do not get me wrong, if I were faced with the choice to choose positivity or negativity I would choose optimism. But the laws of nature and the universe is not objective to either or. Even the idea of calling oneself a ‘realist’ is misleading due to the simple fact of setting limits on the limitless. It is conformity which makes one believe and spread this half-truth idea-form. This new-age positivity coping mechanism is also used as a bypass which results in no actual real and lasting integral progression. It may temporarily solve the issue but in reality, one will eventually come back to the same level of consciousness. Once someone has had “enough” they will realize how misleading and unconscious society is. For the people who are reading and want more of a sincere and aspiring progression that is more aligned with our true-self a raise in consciousness is required. One must heighten and broaden their consciousness to understand the experience. This requires a conscious will that approaches the problem from all imaginable sides. To form an idea based on multiplicity and equilibrium rather than choosing to look at the problem as society does which is in a fragmentative matter. Positivity is only one solution out of many, choosing to address and perceive the problem from different angles is much more fruitful. This leads to the attitude of going into what society address as negativity, our shadows, traumas, wounds, past conditionings and habits. All of which that make us who we are (or at least who we THINK we are). But in effect one comes to find that if you consciously choose to attain this attitude it can ‘open up a whole ‘nother can of worms’. Choosing to respond with an attitude that is more aligned with reality and our true-self requires oneself to enter an unknown and uncomfortable reality. This is tough on some people because as they are already experiencing one undesirable emotion they now start to feel many others.  (and again… in effect people will instead choose to choose comfort over progression and disregard the true solution to their ‘problem’) What I noticed through experience was that there are numerous other problems and feelings that may arise when you try to understand one feeling. This is very uncomfortable and in no way ‘fun’. I understand why so many people in society are interested in superficial things such as consumerism, sports, social media, TV, (many people say they do not watch TV while unaware that it is 2021 and the TV is now in your hand and backpocket) anything in our physical world that distracts our mental and emotional self from being with its self. People are concerned with everything going on outside of them rather than taking that focus and concentrating on what is happening inside of them. At the current moment this is ‘normal’ though, but with the current events that have been taking place more people are raising their consciousness.

Currently, I myself am experiencing this feeling of loneliness again. I have noticed this feeling trying to ‘take me’. Although the experience is not new to me, I can say due to the decisions that I have consciously made I have put myself in this situation. I am realizing that some experiences in life are part of the indeterminable while some are a part of the determinable. (Uncontrollable and controllable) This experience is a little different than the others in my past because I choose to be with no one but myself and I continue to choose to stay to myself. (This is very similar to my past-self) I do not consciously make these decisions out of ignorance and think to myself that I am better than everyone, nor do I go to the extreme at the other end of the spectrum which would be me thinking “I am not like the others no one understands me”. This may sound contradicting to some but to the ones who can relate will understand what I mean for words will not allow the mind to truly grasp what I am stating. I simply am in a temporary moment of my life again where I do not have a person to connect with on this physical plane. I am conscious of this and I am okay with this, for I know this is only temporary and the time will come naturally when it is right and I will have people around me who I can relate and connect with on a more true-level. As I was saying earlier, even though I feel lonely I have a will and a consciousness power that if I use correctly I can have it work with me rather than against me. I am able to choose how I am going to feel and perceive the circumstances I am currently going through. I started out nothing like this though, I use to fall.. and when I would fall I would kick my own self while I was down hard.. very hard.  This is important for those of you who are reading and are currently feeling more ‘down’ than ‘up’. While many people would agree and easily say “Things will get better”, this is true but only a partial or half-truth. Things do get better but due to the cyclical nature of the world and the universal laws, ‘things’ will come back to being what one perceives as ‘bad’. (this is not a logical reason to not want to put in the work to understand oneself and how thyself can effectively make their lives more fruitful) I will express this again.. I am not being negative or pessimistic. I write with sincerity and truthfulness to the readers because I care about people making real change. I can easily say and conform to what society has as its standards but I choose not to. Take a second to look at the world from natures point of view, the seasons change, the breeze comes and goes, the leaves fall, the sun rises and sets, our nature is cyclical and we are no different than that just because we have a brain and walk in a way that appears to be separate from the ground. As they say.. There IS a light at the end of the tunnel, but what they forget to mention is that this light does temporarily tend to, ‘flicker and go out at times’, but that does not change the fact that the light is always there. Another way I like to think of us as is that we are walking through this forest called life, eventually the sun will set and we will have no other option but to walk through the forest at night, this is scary, this is uncomfortable, but this is also only temporary because as time goes on dusk will turn to dawn and the sun will rise once again and on we go in this cyclical manner never forgetting that the Sun is and always will be there.

By Jay Andrew

Hello. My name is Jay and I am here to write about life and life experiences.

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