The Futile Dramatic

The Futile Dramatic

Hello everyone. Today I would like to share a perception on drama. I feel that drama is a subject that is commonly spoken about among peer groups in our society. Very much so that to the point it is normal and if one wants to get rid of conversing with people who speak down upon others they will most likely find that damn near everyone around them partakes in this type of communication. This is embedded in our society to the point we don’t even realize it is going on because we have become so numb to it. Ask yourself, out of eeeeeeverything to talk about why is it that people love to talk down upon others and things?

Just to be clear if I were to explain what the word drama expresses I would say that drama is in form of communication between one and another that is precisely focused on bringing up the ‘bad’ in the other person, place, event, or thing. I’m not saying that all people who speak ‘bad’ or negative are partaking in drama-driven communication, for such conversations can be had without the ‘draining’ effect. Now this is hard to put in words because one has to be experiencing the drama-driven conversation to know what I am trying to express with these words I type now. It is the tone, the vibrations, the attitude that one holds within them and also sends out at the same time that signifies that conversation is drama-driven. The reason why this cannot be put into words so easily is because it is more felt by our being rather than absorbed by the analytical mind. Most people will understand what I mean by this though because we have all been in these type of conversations. It is often the energy and force one puts behind their words that makes the conversation feel draining. One sign that you can tell if the conversation is drama-driven is the person speaking will often embody an alternate low-state of being as they are speaking about the the past person, place, or thing. For instance if one is speaking about an event and person that caused them to become frustrated they will now be frustrated right at the table with you as they tell you the story. Depending on the person who is listening to the story they might not even pick up on this because they are focused on the words and cannont feel the deeper reality behind said words. It is as if their body is ‘numb’ to such feelings. But just because one may not be able to feel or notice the unspoken vibrations behind the words that does not mean they are not effected by it. They still very much so are.

Drama is self-degrading. Without even realizing it when one is holding the drama-driven conversation they think they are only speaking bad upon the other but in reality they are unconsciously portraying their self. While there are many reasons as to why people like to have drama-driven conversations, I would say that one of the main reasons why so many people have this type of conversation is because it makes the person who is speaking ‘badly’ upon the other feel a false and illusive feeling of superiority. This is in the subconscious and if it were to be put into words it would state something along the lines of ‘hey, look at how bad this person/thing is…I am not that, I do not do this, but look they are doing it!’ This goes on without being said and is in the subconscious. And of course the person who dwells in drama will not admit our at least even bring their attention to this. It is similar and to some aspect related to the unhealthy habit of always comparing yourself to others. For one who often has drama-driven conversations has problems with negative Comparison as well. This is a whole ‘nother topic on its own. And for now I will not go into the deeper understandings of Comparison.

Do not get me wrong, I am in no way exempt and a saint of drama-driven conversations. I have had my fair share of it just like everyone else has. It wasn’t until I drew my attention and concentration to what it was that I was doing and looking at it from a different and deeper perspective. As I said in the beginning, when one does this sincerely they will start to notice just how widely socially-acceptable this behavior is. And from there they will see alllll the people around them that unconsciously partake in this low state of behavior. If one wants to truly remove drama from their life they must draw their attention to it when it starts to come up. They must draw themselves away from people who partake in this behavior or at least bring to their attention the more true reality of what they are spending their energy on. Some might say I am being over exaggerative or that it is not that serious. But it must be so, and not because I say so but take a step back and look at the reality of it. We will find that it is often our closest friends and family that ‘speak’ of drama. And this drama-driven behavior is often the cause to many family problems and suffering. Whether what is being said is true or not drama is in no way helpful to anyone or anything. It can even at times cause physical, emotional, and mental violence… And people wonder why so and so ‘hate’ them. Or they wonder why their friends and family don’t seem to get along. Little things like drama-driven conversation can go a long way and effect our reality in ways we thought were not even possible. Quitting the act of drama-driven conversation starts with our selves and takes time to develop. But the more and more one sincerely approaches and becomes aware of this behavior they will start to get rid of it all together. This is not as easy as it sounds though for if you change yourself and want to start participating in less drama-driven conversations you will find that the people around you who do not admit to this faulty will give you backlash. Which in effect might cause a loss of some relationships you have with others, depending on the plane of consciousness the other possesses and how receptive they are. This is why many don’t think its “That Serious”. One cannot say what will happen with your current relationships because it is simply unknown and the possibilities are endless. But one thing you can be certain of is that you yourself will start to notice the change within, and this change within will lighten you..will bring more of a peaceful sense to you and yours.

Sincerely Observing Oneself

Sincerely Observing Oneself

Have you ever caught yourself thinking about who you were, who you are, and who will you be? This can be a scary and deep question to some because once you start thinking about oneself like this it can almost be certain that your mind and your emotions will be led usually down a dark alley with all the negative experiences, thoughts, and emotions one has dealt with or may come to deal with. But the plane of consciousness each individual is at also plays a part in how they react when faced with these unknown questions. If one does not sincerely observe themselves they would say I am pessimistic and should be more positive. These are the by-passers that have the partial truth and falsehood idea of ‘think positive be positive’, ‘think rich grow rich’, ‘all is one, love and light.’ This is one extreme end of the pendulum; the other extreme end would be ‘I am useless’ ‘There is nothing good about me’ ‘I am a failure’. Either way you look at yourself you will find that in both of these responses one is expressing a half truth and being insincere. “I am the greatest person alive.” “I am the stupidest person alive”. Each statement obviously comes from two different people but with different planes of consciousness and both idea-forms will have its effects and consequences. A sincerer approach to these questions would be for one to reconcile and bring their attention to both sides of the pendulum, and working to establish an equilibrium between the two opposite ends. Overall though, one must realize that no matter which approach is taken it is in its own way objective and relatively true. One must not say, “It is this!” “It is that!” For all in itself is absolutely necessary, otherwise there would be no multiplicity of individualistic expression in this infinite existence.

Loneliness

Loneliness

Hello everybody. Today I am expressing and continuing the topic of loneliness. Loneliness is such a wide experience to discuss and many ideas and sub-topics can be branched off from it. I have been noticing and experiencing this myself lately and I am sure that many of you have as well. As I fluidly write this article my intention is not for others to sympathize or to receive condolences. For these are just superficial and ‘normal’ responses one receives from others and ultimately barely even scratches the surface of the ‘problem.’ Instead, I intend to write to better understand these thoughts and emotions that have manifested in effect due to loneliness. (and not only for my understanding but for others to understand the same feeling they are experiencing themselves) Also as we bring our attention and concentration to this experience of loneliness we are temporarily feeling, we can in effect through our free-will choose to form idea-forms that are more aligned with benevolence and onward progression.

Understanding and bringing our attention to loneliness. One of the toughest part of experiencing loneliness has to probably be the person trying to understand this feeling. Some of the key points we must understand is that loneliness and the cause of it is not a ‘one size fits all’. The severity and happenings are innumerable and one must not compare their circumstances to the other for this will only result in more confusion. It is important to realize the feeling of loneliness one feels is the same as others, but the reaction and natural impulse one puts out is determined by their level of consciousness. For instance, I have felt and experienced loneliness many times throughout my life. While some experiences may root from the same cause, there are also other happenings that we have never gone through that result in this feeling of loneliness. It is often more than not the uncontrollable rather than the controllable that makes us feel this way; more on this later. Another point to understand is that the level of consciousness one possesses at the time of the experience is very detrimental to the effect it has on them. Through our own choice we ourselves have the power to either consciously or unconsciously react to this happening. We can consciously or unconsciously choose to bring our attention and concentration to the problem or not. If we consciously choose to bring our attention and concentration to this feeling we in result work towards self-progression and realization instead of ignoring and bottling up the experience and emotion. As I said, depending on the consciousness of the person, choosing to consciously face the feeling and experience is just the beginning. In effect, idea-forms are than created by the individual (some idea-forms are actually not created from the individual, and instead reside and come from the collective idea-forms of society. This is not yet realized or one should say mainstream in modern psychology or by the modern psychologist. For the reader or psychologist to understand how this is even possible requires a ton of explanation and experience. Most importantly direct experience is required for the being, the self-limiting mind along with its finite dialogue more often than not results in denial when this topic is addressed. This will not always be, as we evolve and move forward through time both individually and collectively more people will broaden their perceptions) and more often than not when someone is choosing for the first time to consciously understand this temporal mode of existence they will create self-defeating ideas rather than forward progressive thoughts. Some may choose to blame themselves while another may choose to blame others. Both reactions are of no real help, instead one must tell themselves “It is my responsibility to focus my awareness and try to understand this experience I am temporarily going through.” (that alone requires a strong will and a sincere aspiring attitude for progression) This brings us back to what I am still further explaining on what attitude one chooses to respond with. Just like the causes that led to this experience of loneliness, there are no set or certain happenings that can determine the attitude one will react with. Our attitudes are simply indeterminable and infinite. Our attitudes are mostly drawn and a result from our past traumas, wounds, triggers, shadows, and misleading childhood thought-forms. Once again, these traumas and wounds and etc. vary from person to person and in their nature, are subjective and unlimited. (DO NOT allow yourself to take the words of someone who states, “I had it worse” or “That is not a ‘good’ reason to be lonely” seriously)

Attitude. The person going through and consciously choosing to go through loneliness for the first time will more often than not react and possess a negative attitude compared to the person who has consciously chosen many of times to bring their concentration to the feeling. If I were to imagine or try and understand one of the causes of this, I would say that the current “Positive Mindset Only, Think Happy Be Happy, Positive Vibes Only” you know the basic idea that one should think positive only and everything will eventually be okay idea? Yeaaa, that. This idea-form is very misleading and mis-informative. (one can say it is so widely spread that it has transformed into a false and deceiving characteristic some people use to label their self as) Even though this idea-form is so widely spread and agreed upon through many books, authors, teachers, and solutions that does not necessarily make it ‘right’ or ‘true’. Do not get me wrong, if I were faced with the choice to choose positivity or negativity I would choose optimism. But the laws of nature and the universe is not objective to either or. Even the idea of calling oneself a ‘realist’ is misleading due to the simple fact of setting limits on the limitless. It is conformity which makes one believe and spread this half-truth idea-form. This new-age positivity coping mechanism is also used as a bypass which results in no actual real and lasting integral progression. It may temporarily solve the issue but in reality, one will eventually come back to the same level of consciousness. Once someone has had “enough” they will realize how misleading and unconscious society is. For the people who are reading and want more of a sincere and aspiring progression that is more aligned with our true-self a raise in consciousness is required. One must heighten and broaden their consciousness to understand the experience. This requires a conscious will that approaches the problem from all imaginable sides. To form an idea based on multiplicity and equilibrium rather than choosing to look at the problem as society does which is in a fragmentative matter. Positivity is only one solution out of many, choosing to address and perceive the problem from different angles is much more fruitful. This leads to the attitude of going into what society address as negativity, our shadows, traumas, wounds, past conditionings and habits. All of which that make us who we are (or at least who we THINK we are). But in effect one comes to find that if you consciously choose to attain this attitude it can ‘open up a whole ‘nother can of worms’. Choosing to respond with an attitude that is more aligned with reality and our true-self requires oneself to enter an unknown and uncomfortable reality. This is tough on some people because as they are already experiencing one undesirable emotion they now start to feel many others.  (and again… in effect people will instead choose to choose comfort over progression and disregard the true solution to their ‘problem’) What I noticed through experience was that there are numerous other problems and feelings that may arise when you try to understand one feeling. This is very uncomfortable and in no way ‘fun’. I understand why so many people in society are interested in superficial things such as consumerism, sports, social media, TV, (many people say they do not watch TV while unaware that it is 2021 and the TV is now in your hand and backpocket) anything in our physical world that distracts our mental and emotional self from being with its self. People are concerned with everything going on outside of them rather than taking that focus and concentrating on what is happening inside of them. At the current moment this is ‘normal’ though, but with the current events that have been taking place more people are raising their consciousness.

Currently, I myself am experiencing this feeling of loneliness again. I have noticed this feeling trying to ‘take me’. Although the experience is not new to me, I can say due to the decisions that I have consciously made I have put myself in this situation. I am realizing that some experiences in life are part of the indeterminable while some are a part of the determinable. (Uncontrollable and controllable) This experience is a little different than the others in my past because I choose to be with no one but myself and I continue to choose to stay to myself. (This is very similar to my past-self) I do not consciously make these decisions out of ignorance and think to myself that I am better than everyone, nor do I go to the extreme at the other end of the spectrum which would be me thinking “I am not like the others no one understands me”. This may sound contradicting to some but to the ones who can relate will understand what I mean for words will not allow the mind to truly grasp what I am stating. I simply am in a temporary moment of my life again where I do not have a person to connect with on this physical plane. I am conscious of this and I am okay with this, for I know this is only temporary and the time will come naturally when it is right and I will have people around me who I can relate and connect with on a more true-level. As I was saying earlier, even though I feel lonely I have a will and a consciousness power that if I use correctly I can have it work with me rather than against me. I am able to choose how I am going to feel and perceive the circumstances I am currently going through. I started out nothing like this though, I use to fall.. and when I would fall I would kick my own self while I was down hard.. very hard.  This is important for those of you who are reading and are currently feeling more ‘down’ than ‘up’. While many people would agree and easily say “Things will get better”, this is true but only a partial or half-truth. Things do get better but due to the cyclical nature of the world and the universal laws, ‘things’ will come back to being what one perceives as ‘bad’. (this is not a logical reason to not want to put in the work to understand oneself and how thyself can effectively make their lives more fruitful) I will express this again.. I am not being negative or pessimistic. I write with sincerity and truthfulness to the readers because I care about people making real change. I can easily say and conform to what society has as its standards but I choose not to. Take a second to look at the world from natures point of view, the seasons change, the breeze comes and goes, the leaves fall, the sun rises and sets, our nature is cyclical and we are no different than that just because we have a brain and walk in a way that appears to be separate from the ground. As they say.. There IS a light at the end of the tunnel, but what they forget to mention is that this light does temporarily tend to, ‘flicker and go out at times’, but that does not change the fact that the light is always there. Another way I like to think of us as is that we are walking through this forest called life, eventually the sun will set and we will have no other option but to walk through the forest at night, this is scary, this is uncomfortable, but this is also only temporary because as time goes on dusk will turn to dawn and the sun will rise once again and on we go in this cyclical manner never forgetting that the Sun is and always will be there.

Aloneness and Loneliness

Aloneness and Loneliness

According to a study done by experts at Harvard University, more than 5.34 million people are experiencing loneliness RIGHT NOW. (Now some will read that and take it what it is for and run off and repeat it without question. Others, will question the statement and think well how can they be so sure about that) Congrats to the second group of people who have learned not to be so gullible when it comes to reading news or ‘statistics’ lol because I totally just made that number and study up. I don’t have to be an expert NOR do I have to attend “Harvard University” to not only infer but intuitively know that loneliness is one mode of suffering that many people experience. So many things can be said about loneliness and it can easily branch off into other subtopics, but for today I would like to share my perception on loneliness and aloneness.

Loneliness and aloneness are known as synonyms, and if you look up the definitions they will most likely state the same thing. For this moment though I’d like you all to try and think of them as opposites to each other. Or even a better word to describe them, Aloneness is Complementary to loneliness. Loneliness. Most of us can first handedly describe and share what it is like to be lonely. For loneliness is experienced by tons of people and this direct experience itself makes us truthfully KNOW what loneliness is without thinking about it intellectually and using our mind-instrument to describe it. I refer to loneliness here as its more known meaning which is a temporary mode of suffering and pain, a negative emotion, and what most people consider an undesirable experience. Loneliness can be perceived in many different ways and can vary in severity depending on the consciousness of the person experiencing it; there is no one size fits all. In times like now especially more than usual, people are experiencing loneliness, even though detrimental external events are bound to cause loneliness to people we still come to the fact that loneliness has been around far before the present and recent past happenings. Why is something that is not only widely known by the mind but experienced directly by millions and millions of people hardly ever spoken about? Why do people in group conversations like to make boring superficial talk about their accolades and ‘plans’ at restaurant dinner tables? Why is our society based off how much we have rather than how much we give? One can even assume and question the fact that most “Friends” (Convos between you and one other) do not touch upon important topics such as loneliness when they talk to each other. Loneliness can invoke feelings of vulnerability, (which many people have a false perception of this feeling) can make one feel insecure, (everyone/the majority possess to some degree or less a level of insecurity) and can have one feeling like he/she is in an unknown space and very uncomfortable empty abys. Loneliness can have one thinking such detrimental thoughts such as “why am I such a ‘loser’’, “there is something ‘wrong’ with me”, “I am not ‘normal’ why can’t I be like the others.” Feelings and though-forms such as those said unconsciously smother the person who consciously perceive and notice this feeling of loneliness. For the people who do not feel or think in this type of way are for the most part not facing their feelings and thoughts for what they are and instead find external stimuli to avert their concentration and attention to. This is a whole ‘nother topic in itself and is very harmful to the well-being of a person. Said persons and the large-sum of people who react in this way will most likely keep responding in this unconscious/unhealthy way their whole lives. Now for the others that not only feel this loneliness but courageously (at the moment one has no idea they are reacting in a more courageous way) draw their concentration to it, problems inevitably start to rise due to the unconscious/ignorant idea-forms one has of this reality we call the universe and of themselves. This world is built and ran off of falsehood, so for one to judge and conform yourself to society and your immediate peers is not necessarily ‘wrong’ or ‘bad’, but perhaps not aligned with your potential true-self.

Loneliness can be felt by one who is either in their room by themselves or in a crowded market area. Both scenarios have the same core feeling of being separated from others and themselves. I have felt different planes of loneliness throughout my life. Some are easier to describe and put into words while other levels of loneliness are too draining to even put into an idea or written statement for one to comprehend what it must be like. (Many will understand what I mean by this if the experience is known) I use to have this overwhelmingly feeling of loneliness all while pretending everything was okay. I would feel so separated internally that I naturally started to exist externally in the same way. From moments of locking myself up in my bedroom and not leaving the house all summer to locking myself in the restroom stall in school during lunch break. From other moments of walking down the halls with nowhere else to go and no one else to see but my next scheduled class and teacher, to walking with my family and still feeling this emotion of separateness. I always over-thought that… did anyone else? I always over-thought and questioned my showing up early or being the first to enter class in high school. I would think to myself useless things such as ‘you don’t want to be seen always going into class early and or being the first one, people will think you are lame’. I observed that, and some people can relate to this and can take notice that mostly all the kids in between passing time for class are mingling with other friends and don’t usually go straight to class. For the majority of high school, I never had friends to speak to on my way to class or spend extra time to go and see before the bell rang. Despite that, I would make it seem like I did and would sometimes just walk around aimlessly to kill time so I could be like the others. I would think too deeply about my circumstance, and obviously this over-thinking was in no way benefiting me. I have briefly described here some instances and happenings in my life relating to loneliness strictly to give the reader who may be experiencing or has experienced loneliness something to relate to. Perhaps the truth is that many people experience loneliness, it’s just very few express this to others who aren’t ‘close’ to them. And if I were asked why is that so I would have to reply with I do not know… for to even began thinking about or writing about that statement is a whole ‘nother article in itself. There are many causes, experiences, events and catalyst that can be said about why people do not openly express true feelings, thoughts, and desires.

Now, as I said earlier… I believe loneliness is only a temporary mode of existence. (It is in a way an illusion, I use the word illusion here in meaning of not belonging to the supreme reality and truth of our nature, but with that being said this illusion is still very real) And I can now say as well, loneliness is a great teacher. I understand it is difficult for one who is directly experiencing this feeling to even consider that but in due time one may come to this realization if they consciously choose to, in due time. The same way one got themselves in this state of loneliness whether that be unconsciously or consciously, one must use their will to get themselves out. Once again, this free-will can be strong or weak, conscious or unconscious, concentrated or ignorant. There are innumerable ways to get out this mode we call loneliness. Some ways may be more or less beneficial to the being while other ways may temporarily solve the issue but in the long-term still existing in a dark corner of one’s being. If one is to consciously solve their feeling of isolation and separateness than one must begin by willfully thinking and concentrating on the reality of things and our existence. Things such as in the ‘beginning’ we came into this world alone and in the ‘end’ we have no other choice but to ‘leave’ alone. Observe nature, even nature seems to us to be connected more than we are. The trees are still… rooted, grounded, and connected to the earth while we walk along this world not confined to anyone or anything, seemingly and illusively separate from our nature. But this is not so, our sense-vision is deceiving to us and if we fail to understand the higher reality of our self and nature we will only continue to endure suffering and pain in moments where one can choose not to. Everything and everyone seems separate from us but in reality, we are all interconnected. The animal gives and receives to the plant while the plant receives and gives to the animal. There is a natural give and receive relationship in this existence. What seems like loneliness is a misconceived and false perception of the truth-existence of our aloneness. Now I speak of aloneness here in a way of truth, positivity, delight, and calmness. If one wants to solve their problem of loneliness at its roots than one must go into this aloneness. This seems contradicting but it is far from that, by going into our aloneness and realizing the inner self and doing the inner work that must be done one consequently comes out of this draining mode of loneliness. Now of course this is not the only way to realize and get oneself out of this feeling. Reason and thought can also be used to heal oneself. In this way, the mind is more involved and relied upon. One uses reason to develop idea-forms to present to themselves and in effect change their perception of their current reality. While this can solve the problem of loneliness temporarily it still only scratches the surface. For the mind is an instrument used for our will. The mind is incapable of understanding the infinite and unlimited existence in everything and everyone. The mind is for memory and not where true-knowledge exists. I consciously choose to realize the other perception of loneliness which I refer to here as aloneness. Do not get me wrong though, it took me years and constant battles with my mind ego to realize a more aligned perception of my aloneness. Before I tried using my mind, ego, and other external stimuli to solve my issue. But I don’t know.. during those moments I just felt like something was still missing. There was still something inside of me that was lingering behind. When I started to choose a different perception of loneliness and not only think of it but feel it in a more beneficial way, I noticed other parts of my being were being effected as well. Aloneness is a beautiful thing really; in time of despair aloneness is mistaken for a falsehood of negativity. In reality aloneness is necessary for one who consciously chooses to fix their issues at their roots. Take for example, the couple who always spends time together. They hardly ever are seen apart and in need of always having each other by their sides. While this can temporarily not be an issue, in the long-term it begins to have an effect. Without one even noticing or realizing it they become tired and bored of what seems to be the same presence of their significant other. They start to think they ‘know’ each other, they start to take each other for granted, they don’t pick up on the lovely little things that are changing without and within each other. They have unconsciously sacrificed aloneness and the teachings it comes with to avoid feelings of loneliness in their relationship. Whether one consciously chooses to be alone or one unconsciously chooses to be lonely, what can be said about both is that they are extremely valuable teachers and many lessons can be learned through these experiences.

Loneliness and aloneness are one of the greatest teachers of life. Mostly everyone, if not everyone, will go through this experience. We have a choice to consciously or unconsciously take this lesson and attain as much knowledge out of it as we can. No matter what the determinate or cause of this feeling is, what matters is that the feeling is there and equal to all. Loneliness does not pick and choose based off of external characteristics like race, gender, age, or marital status. Loneliness is a part of this world and in order for us to accommodate to it we must establish in our true-being an equilibrium within. We must understand that loneliness and aloneness are two different poles on the same pendulum. The pendulum may go from one extreme to the other throughout our lives, even at spontaneous moments this pendulum will naturally be balanced and in the middle of the two. But with a strong, persevering, and conscious will we can choose to ultimately have our balance with this pendulum and in effect feel and experience less pain and suffering. The choice is ours, we must plant the seed now if we wish to reap the fruit later.